So I’m having one of those days where I feel great. I don’t know why, maybe because it’s Friday? Maybe because this dress fits really nice on the hips (dangerous on the v though…I’m at work hoping like hell I don’t show too much). Maybe it’s because I crushed my insanity fit test? Maybe I’m just starting to feel better in my own skin because I’m taking good care of myself.
I gained a lot of weight, about 50 lbs, in about 4 or 5 months. That is fast, unhealthy, and just ridiculous. There is really only one reason – emotional eating. I really let a situation that was hard on my family break me down. It was really from trying so hard to be there and not show my emotions. I was trying to be strong because I felt I needed too because of everything going on. I let my healthy eating habits, my gym habits, my sleeping habits go to hell. I regret that. I do not regret being strong because I think that strength was important and necessary and vital. I regret not taking better care of myself and letting all the good habits I had nurtured go. I tried, many times over those months to get back on track but it never stuck.
Now I sit here almost 12 months from the point when my weight started on its journey back up the scale. I’ve lost about 30 of the 50 lbs I gained. I have a long way to go. Another 20 back to “zero” then another 60 or so to the finish line. But I’m doing the right things, eating the right foods, working the right exercise. I’m feeling like I’m on a good road, one that leads to finally doing all the things I have wanted to achieve for years. I feel good. I feel pretty.